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I am currently feeling a bit of exhaustion. I am working long hours at work and am finding little time or energy for the things that help encourage and sustain me. When I do spend time in ministry, I find myself lacking by either not studying the the vigor and desire that I have in the past or I find that my ministry isn’t there, because I’ve made priority for other things. I have seen myself teeter into a place where sin jumps out (by way of lack of patience and anger or just laziness by using down time to ‘veg’ and not be productive). This becomes a spiral that if not managed can spin out of control.
Last week, I mentioned this to my small group and asked for prayer. It doesn’t seem to be getting better (the time thing will only get worse this month), however, God has done a work tonight. Tonight I decided to read some and God used that to put me in my place. I am currently reading “Memoirs of an Ordinary Pastor” by D.A. Carson and am enjoying the book, although it seems to be taking me quite some time to get through this little 150 page book. I am in a chapter where Tom Carson is in a similar place to myself (actually, not even close, but he is frustrated with his ministry). This note by Don below is exactly what I needed to hear this evening. Hopefully, it will be equally encouraging to you.

But I cannot allow that (self-recognition of my own inadequacies in ministry) to drive me to despair; rather, it must drive me to a greater grasp of the simple gospel of grace, and God accepts us because of his Son. I must learn of the merits of God’s Son. The ministry is so open-ended that one never feels that all possible work has been done, or done as well as one might like. There are always more people to visit, more studying to be done, more preparation to do. What Christians must do, what Christian leaders must do, is constantly remember that we serve our God and Maker and Redeemer under the gospel of grace.

How encouraging is it to remember that if we keep ourselves close to the cross, we will be sustained through that cross. When we feel that our ministry is inadequate, we can be reminded that it’s His ministry and we’re just along for the ride.